In March of 2015, my son turned twenty-two. His public-school career ended and he was thrusted forward into the special needs world of Adult Services. Another transition. Another adjustment. Whoever said, "the only constant is change" was so right. Just when my son finally was accustomed to is residential school where he was safe, supported, and happy, the winds of change forced him into another direction. As a special needs student, the law required him to exit the school system and abandon his supports at age twenty-two. Now what?
Fear of the unknown, of what lies ahead for him reared its ugly head once again. There are fewer supports in Adult Services and choices are limited. Most group homes and day programs are understaffed, with many workers under-trained and underpaid. Ian has a below 40 IQ, is nonverbal and will always require 24/7 care. As an aging single parent, I didn’t have a choice but to make a choice of placement for him. I had to trust that wherever he landed he would be taken care of. I've always had to make choices for him based on the knowledge and level of choice I had at the time. It never seemed to be enough. Most parents get to experience "empty nest" and fill it with celebration of their children's moving on into their adult lives and adding more branches to the family tree. They celebrate birthdays, graduations, proms, weddings, and grandchildren. Parents like me just want to know that their adult child will be safe, supported, and happy; and perhaps with a little luck surrounded by people who grow to love them just the way they are.
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